Are You Making These Top 10 Break Up Mistakes?

By Jenna James

You’re distraught, upset and heart-broken, so it’s understandable you’ll find yourself willing to do pretty much anything to “>get your ex back. The ten mistakes below are extremely common, and will almost completely kill your chances of getting your ex back. Undoubtedly you’ve either seen friends make these mistakes or maybe YOU made them in the past.

If you want to succeed in getting your ex back, avoid the following ten behaviors as if your life depends on it. Your life doesn’t depend on it, but your relationship does. If you manage to avoid the mistakes, you’re chances of mending your broken relationship are pretty damn good.

1. Panic Contact – This is what happens when you let your distress and shock get the best of you. You don’t know what to do. All you want is to change things back to how they were, rewind time, and fix the problem immediately. So you do the only thing you can think of and try to contact your ex hoping you can reason him or her back into dating you. And the more you panic, the more you end up instigating damaging contact. All your begging, crying, and screaming serves only to convince your ex that he or she made the right decision.

2. Laying on the Guilt – Once things start looking final and your begging doesn’t seem to be working, it’s natural to want to guilt your ex into staying with you – a bad idea.

Once you start saying things like, “If you really loved me, you wouldn’t do this,” “I’ve given you so much and this is how you repay me,” and “I knew this would happen, you never were good at relationships,” you’re sending yourself down a dangerous path. This may seem like a valid tactic, but it’s really just a form of manipulation that will send your ex in the opposite direction you want them to go.

3. Settling for Friendship – You’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Your ex most likely loves you as a person, so when you agree to be “just friends,” it’s an excellent resolution for him or her. He or she gets to keep you in his life without dating you. Unfortunately, by demoting yourself to the role of friend, you end up setting yourself up to get hurt. Instead, you need to set boundaries. Seek out the support of other friends.

Don’t trick yourself into believing that remaining friends is the only way you can keep your ex in your life. You have to let go completely, especially if you want the chance of getting back together in the future. Remember, if you stay friends, you’ll have to be a “good friend” and support your ex when he or she starts dating someone else. Sound painful?

4. Sleeping with Your Ex – So you shouldn’t revise your relationship to not include sex (being friends), but you also shouldn’t reduce your relationship to just sex. Sleeping with your ex is “fun” for you ex, and a big “I hope” for you. But that hope is unlikely to ever pan out.

5. Resorting to Drugs or Alcohol – It may seem like there’s no alternative, but drowning your sorrows in this manner makes you unappealing to your ex and is dangerous to yourself. And when you finally come out of it, you’ll feel bad.

6. Spiralling into Obsession – It’s understandable, you’re hurt. So giving voice to your woes and discussing your ex is okay… to a point. If you’re talking about your ex constantly to anyone who will listen, you’re apt to drive away friends and family members in addition to driving away your ex. It isn’t healthy to obsess. Give your mourning the time it deserves then think happier thoughts.

7. Harassing Your Ex’s Friends – You shouldn’t be in contact with your ex at all in the early stages of your break up. That INCLUDES being in contact with his or her friends. Sometimes this might suck, but for your sake, it’s the best thing to do.

8. Spying, Stalking, and Anything Creepy – Let the characters in movies do all the spying. You need to focus on yourself and not on what your ex is doing. There is nothing you can do about it. You’re only going to rile yourself up.

9. Gifting Your Ex – You can’t buy your ex back with cute, thoughtful, or expensive gifts. Even if you could, he or she wouldn’t be interested in you… just in what you could give.

10. Badmouthing Your Ex – No matter how much you want to drag your ex’s name through the mud for hurting you, 99% of the time it will come back to haunt you. Be adult about your break up, and save your angry comments for behind closed doors.

These are the things NOT to do. But then what are the things you should be doing?

I reveal dozens of surprisingly simple secrets in my courses Bait Him Back and Bait Her Back. By using just one tip, you’ll increase your chances at getting back together if your situation seems hopeless.

Also, get your free 7-day email training course to win your ex back by clicking here. After you register for free, you’ll get some tips revealed only in my course and be able to get your copy.

Have you recently experienced a breakup, and now you are hoping that you can win love back?

Getting your ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend to fall madly in love with you once again is an endeavor that can be quite difficult. However, if you want to win love back, and you have the dedication and the patience to achieve it, you may be able to make it happen.

The first thing you need to do in order to win love back is to figure out what went wrong in the relationship in the first place. What did you do, or what did your ex do, in order to make the relationship dissolve?

You need to be able to address the problems in the relationship in order to win love back.

If you cannot rectify the issues that led to the breakup, then you are not going to be able to win love back when it comes to your relationship.

If you want to win back his heart, then you are going to have to proceed slowly but surely. If you messed up and did something wrong and that led to the dissolving of your relationship, then what you need to do is apologize, and work to regain the trust of your ex.

Are you certain that you want to win love back in the first place? Do you want your ex back or are you simply afraid to be alone? What is going to keep you from messing things up again? Are you dedicated to repairing the relationship once and for all, or might you slip up again?

If you are sure that you want to rekindle things, and you are sure that your goal is to win love back, then you need to let him know by apologizing for the problems in the past, communicating better with him than ever before, and giving him the space that he needs to figure out what he wants to do in the relationship. If you do not give him any space, the results of the relationship will not be to your liking.

Find out what it is that caused the relationship to fall apart, and fix it. If he was bored with you, find a way to liven things up. If you cheated on him, find a way to prove that you’ve stopped. Once you can undo the underlying causes of the break up, you and your ex can start learning to rebuild things in a healthy and proactive way and this will allow you to win love back once and for all.

Learning how to win love back is all about knowing what went wrong the first time around so that you can prevent it from happening again. It may take some serious time and effort, but the investment is well worthwhile when you consider the positive results that are possible in situations like these.

Make My Ex Love Me Again

Emotional infidelity is almost always the first step on the road to cheating, and may well be considered cheating its own right. There is far more to a relationship than just have a physical relationship with only one person and one person only. The truly satisfying and meaningful part of a relationship is the bond of trust that you share with the other person. Read more

Finished with your guy? Want to desperately get your guy back? Then you’re going to have to use a strategy that will help you get him back and not cause him to head for the hills! Read more

Honestly, I don’t need help to get my boyfriend back right now (I did once) – but I’m betting that you do? I see and hear it all the time. A woman gets dumped by her boyfriend – or she dumps him and then realizes that it was a major mistake – and then all you hear is “I need help to get my boyfriend back.”

There are pages and pages on the Internet filled with advice on just how to do it too. All sorts of them!

The GOOD ones all have the same first piece of advice for those who need help to get their ex back too. It’s a piece of advice that MOST of us don’t want to hear – but there is a TON of validity to it.

Time – purely and simply – it’s time. Taking some time away from your ex is the single most important step you can take. Your cry for help – your “I need help to get my boyfriend back” scream IS being answered. Are you listening? Or are you one of those people that asks for advice and then stops listening when you don’t hear what you want to hear? Or one of those people that ask for help and then, when they learn that it might be hard – you don’t listen?

My purpose is not to badger you or make your life more difficult – you already have enough of that by your desire to get your boyfriend back. You’re tired, you’re lonely and you’re maybe a little desperate.

Usually when you hear those calls for help, those “I need help to get my boyfriend back” (or girlfriend, for that matter), you really do want to help. Most humans are compassionate. We know that mistakes get made in even the best of relationships every single day. Most of us have been there at some point in our lives. Advice is easy to give – taking it is a little harder.

When we’re sad, lonely, tired and desperate – we often don’t think things through clearly enough to make sound decisions. That’s why it’s the SMART people who DO ask for advice. Who DO say something like “I need help to get my boyfriend back.”

We need someone who is a bystander, an unbiased opinion, to help us find the way. So we need to learn to listen – really listen to the advice we are given – and then follow through on that advice.

Think about it. If you’re searching the Internet for advice or help to get your boyfriend back and 20 sites that you visit tell you to take some time – step back and evaluate the situation (no matter how they actually word it) and ONE site gives you some tricky-dicky way to get him back in your arms tomorrow – what would be the SMART thing to do? Who is giving you advice that you want to hear and then who is giving you advice that is sound and true?

Bottom line for all of you who are screaming, “I need help to get my boyfriend back”?

Step back – think it through – and follow the advice of someone who tells it like it is.

With compassion, forthrightness and TRUTH. If you’re ready to really listen – to have your call, “I need help to get my boyfriend back” answered then it’s time to take a leap of faith and visit with TW Jackson and The Magic of Making UP.

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If you dumped girlfriend and you want her back, then you’re going to have to move fast but not so fast that you make the classic mistakes that guys make when they’re trying desperately to get back with their exs.

Read more

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For some who have been dumped, understanding how to win ex girlfriend back can be a major problem and to be honest without a specific plan, most never figure out how to get their ex girlfriend back.

If you’re one hundred percent sure that you want to win ex girlfriend back then your first job is to read through this article and then take the action suggested.

Without a doubt you’ll get nowhere if you don’t stop and think about what you’re doing. Running around making grand gestures, as many do, is a quick way to losing your ex girlfriend for good. So if you’ve been sending designer perfume, booking romantic meals out, you need to stop that now and reflect.

Break off all communication with your ex and leave her alone. She has dumped you for a reason and if you want to win ex girlfriend back, then ignoring her wishes will only send her in the opposite direction. So accept that by leaving you she has expressly and physically demonstrated her need for some time and space on her own and honor that.

Instead, spend the time away from her thinking about what went wrong and what was your role in the breakup. If you made a mistake that caused the breakup, don’t waste time beating yourself up and feeling sorry for yourself. Instead take a long hard look at your behavior and take the necessary steps to change whatever needs changing.

Do you have anger issues? If you do then you should seriously consider talking to a professional who can help you cope with this and find different ways of expressing anger that do not threaten or cause harm.

Are you struggling with trust issues to the point that you were constantly wanting to know where your ex girlfriend was and who she was with? Work on building up your own self-esteem and self-confidence, because usually that is what is missing in cases like these.

Did you find yourself cheating on her even though you loved her? Well then take the time to find out why you were doing that and what you can do to stop temptation when it next comes along.

The truth is whatever the reason she walked out on you, to win ex girlfriend back you’re going to have to do some serious and some honest and sincere work. If she has gone as far as walking out, then a flimsy gesture to get her back won’t work. Believe her actions: she is ready to put your relationship on the line if things don’t change.

The Magic of Making Up

Did your boyfriend break up with you? This is a rough time in your life. You are probably hurting and want to know what caused your boyfriend break up. Read more

So you want to get back together with ex? You are wanting to try it again? What makes you think that it is going to be any different this time than the last time? There may have been a point where you thought that things were going all right and everything was under control. Obviously it wasn’t the case or you wouldn’t be reading this. Read more

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How to save a marriage from failing after a disastrous and catastrophic event has taken place may seem like a hard thing to do – but it can be done. There are many times when something horrible has happened in the life of a couple; so much so that the stress ends up being too much to bear. These are the times when it is important to know how to save a marriage. Read more

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To get your lover back you may have to try a little tenderness if the relationship ended with an explosion. Maybe the end of the marriage or the relationship resulted in a lot of hurt feelings and fights that resulted in some emotional pain. It could be there was something tragic that happened that caused the breakup. There may have been some wrong committed that caused humiliation for either party. Whatever the case, feelings were and probably still are hurt and if you want to get lover back, you will have to work gently and try to help heal the wounds that are there. Read more

Jim works long hours and Lisbet doesn’t feel he is there for her. Lisbet spends all of her time meeting the children’s needs and Jim feels that she doesn’t have time for his needs? Can this relationship be saved? Should it be saved? Here’s how to save a relationship. Read more

Do you know these 7 concrete ways to build trust in a relationship? Often, what really makes a relationship work are not the things we think of first. For instance, do you think you always need to spice things up? Wrong! Predictability is more important than variety in a relationship. The following seven methods are guaranteed to grow your connection by improving the level of trust in a relationship.

First: As I mentioned in the opening paragraph, you need to be predictable. This goes against the common notion that you need to “stir things up” to keep the romance alive. Sure, going to a new restaurant or giving a surprise gift can be nice, but most of all, we need things to be consistent and steady in order to make our relationships work. Consider that trust in a relationship is built on being reliable day in and day out.

Second: You need to make sure that your words always match the message. This means that your partner needs to hear the words which match your body language. If you say you are happy but you are frowning, your partner doesn’t hear your words, he or she sees your face and the tone in your voice. Your parter needs to be able to trust what you are saying. When the words match the message, you build trust in a relationship.

Third: You need to have a fundamental belief in your partner’s competency. If you don’t you won’t have the trust in a relationship that you need. When lovingly communicated, the truth is never destructive. When you do not believe that your partner is competent at some things (or indeed, anything), you violate the trust in a relationship.

Fourth: Don’t keep secrets. Secrets destroy the trust in a relationship. Be honest and open. Assume everything you know will eventually come out. Secrets require enormous energy on your part. That is energy that could be going into building the relationship.

Fifth: Don’t be afraid to let your partner know what your needs are. Don’ t make him or her guess what you need. Let them know. It is okay to be self-centered as long as you are not selfish. Indeed, if you are reluctant to assert your needs, you may go overboard in the opposite direction and smother your partner.

Sixth: Learn to say no. When your partner voices his or her needs, that is a good thing. But you don’t need to say yes to everything. A partner cannot respect you if you never say no. Refusing to be subjugated to the other person’s will actually builds trust in a relationship.

Seventh: Always pursue growth. When you plant a flower, you begin by digging in the dirt. Digging in the dirt of our relationships can sometimes cause pain. But, through that pain, we prepare the soil for future growth. Don’t be afraid of turmoil, crisis, or questions. These become the fertilizer for growth and change. Embrace what is difficult.

When you decide to work on trust in a relationship, you are bound to encounter a little pain. But, as you work through this pain, you will not only become stronger as an individual, you will also strengthen your coupledom.

How Even A Slob Was Able To Get Back His Ex

Mike was at a loss as to how to get an ex girlfriend back. Suzie had dumped him saying that he was a slob. Mike and Suzie had been talking about moving in together and Suzie said she realized that she just wasn’t able to take a relationship to the next level when the partner couldn’t even maintain his own hygiene. Now Mike was at a loss about how to get an ex girlfriend back.

Mike took a careful assessment of himself. He noted that he often didn’t shave on the weekends. He hadn’t had a haircut in 8 weeks. Suzie had often casually mentioned that he might want to get a manicure but he dismissed this as “girl stuff.”

He also looked around his apartment and realized that it was a pig sty. No wonder Suzie hadn’t wanted to set up housekeeping with him!

Armed with this crucial information about himself, he decided that he needed to win Suzie over. The question for Mike was how to get an ex girlfriend back?

While Mike wasn’t very good at cleaning himself, he did hire a housekeeping service to do a deep clean on his apartment and then scheduled them to come in once a week. He also the housekeeper put doing his laundry on their list of things to do so that he would always have a clean shirt and pair of undershorts to wear. Mike was determined to win back his ex girlfriend and this added expense was well within the price he was willing to pay to get back the woman he loved.

He made a point to shower and shave every day – even when he wasn’t going to see anybody. He figured making a habit of it would be a good idea (as well as a healthy one!). Mike also made sure that he brushed his teeth morning and evening, something he had neglected from time to time before.

After Mike had cleaned up his act, the next step was how to get an “ex girlfriend back campaign” was to write a letter to Suzie telling her about the changes he had made. He even included photos of himself and his newly maintained apartment.

Suzie was touched enough to agree to have coffee with Mike. She really loved Mike, but had felt that nagging was the only way to get him to change. She wanted to take the relationship to the next level and get a home together, but didn’t feel that she could live with such a slob. Suzie rightfully thought that if a man couldn’t take care of his own personal cleanliness, how could he maintain a deep relationship? Immaturity in hygiene doesn’t bode well for the more serious maturity in a relationship!

Mike acknowledged her concerns. He said that there were things that he could do a better job at, like taking care of his personal grooming. He also admitted that he was unlikely to do a lot of the housekeeping, but he had hired a maid service to do that for him knowing that having a clean place was important to Suzie.

Suzie appreciated the efforts that Mike had made. She said she wasn’t ready to change residences based on a few week’s efforts though. Mike and Suzie agreed that they would start going out again and, in six month’s time, reconsider moving in together – based on whether Mike had truly become less of a slob.

Mike decoded the secret of how to get an ex girlfriend back and saved a relationship that meant a lot to him. How did he do this? Well, in this case Suzie made it easy for him by clearly stating her desires. But other guys aren’t quite so lucky. They failed to listen to what their ex girlfriend really wanted. Whether it be a “cleaner act” or a more attentive nature, the point is to listen and be ready and able to give to your girlfriend the things she needs and wants in a relationship.
In the Magic of Making Up, TW Jackson, reveals how to really listen to your ex girlfriend, how to interpret what she is saying and how to come though with what she needs. Don’t bang around in the dark when this truly amazing ebook can bring your right to the source of the problem and show you how to get back your ex.

Getting Over Your Break Up The Five Steps of Recovery

Are you getting over break up right now? Do you hurt so bad that you feel like your heart is going to explode? Do you want to see the other person one minute and want to kill them the next? That is all par for the course when you are getting over break up.

Just as there are stages of grief when mourning someone who has died, there are also steps that must be taken when getting over a break up. One woman whose first husband died and second husband divorced her said that it was actually easier getting over the death of a husband than it was recovering from divorce. That is because there’s societal support when someone dies, but you are supposed to go about getting over break up on your own.

First: You should do is sit down and write a long letter to your ex. Pour out your heart. Share the experiences you had together. Tell him or her why you loved them. Put on paper how you feel about the break up. Call them names. It’s okay to emote in this letter because no one is ever going to see it. That is because you are going to light a candle and burn the letter over the candle’s flame. There are not many rituals that go along with breaking up, but this one can help you on the road to emotional recovery.

Second: You need to arrange to exchange stuff. If you have been in a relationship of any length, you probably have some stuff of his at your place and he’s got your things at his. You probably want much of this stuff back and he or she is equally eager to get theirs. Work out a time for a mutual exchange.

If there are things of your ex’s that aren’t going to be exchanged, either box them up or throw them away. Don’t leave your ex’s toothbrush lying around the bathroom because it will only remind you of them as you are trying to go about getting over the break up.

Third: It is also a good idea to box up any gifts your ex gave you for a time. Wearing a watch that your ex gave you will make you think of them every time you check to see what time it is. That’s just not a good idea when getting over a break up.

Fourth: There are sometimes financial matters that need to be straightened out when getting over a break up. If you owe your ex money, try to either pay it off from your own funds or get another loan to pay it off. If you have a checking account together, work out how you are going to divvy it up and then go to the bank to close it.

What you should be seeing is a pattern of closing out the parts of your lives that you shared. This is essential to getting over break up.

Fifth: After you have done what is necessary, agree to have no contact for thirty days. This will allow you to start building separate lives. You shouldn’t call, text, email, or meet the other person during this time. You may even want to agree that some places such as a specific bar or even a given church “belong” to one party or the other during this month long period.

After you have had time to begin building a separate life, you will be able to interact more normally once again. This is a difficult time, so give yourself the space you need in order to go about getting over a break up.

Getting over a break-up, even an amicable one, can be a lonely road but you just have to get through each step and each day – one at a time. If you’re still wanting your ex back even a month after a break-up then perhaps, T.W. Jackson’s book The Magic of Making Up can help you get him (or her)back. After your one month separation is the perfect time to go over the relationship you had with your ex and it’s quite possible that T. W. can help you, help yourself, get your ex back.
If you’re still wanting your ex back even a month after a break-up then perhaps, T.W. Jackson’s book The Magic of Making Up can help you get him (or her)back. After your one month separation is the perfect time to go over the relationship you had with your ex and it’s quite possible that T. W. can help you, help yourself, get your ex back.